Theme: Feminine Strength and Violence Against Women
"My mother was obsessed with the poet Nikki Giovanni, in love with her unabashed feminine strength and her reconciliation of love and revolution." (page 7)
Here the theme of the strength of women, which recurs throughout the chapter, is introduced for the first time. Wes's mother likes Nikki Giovanni not for the beauty of her poetry, but for what she symbolizes for women. Ms. Moore's past is one of conflict between love and revolution: though she believed she loved Bill, ultimately he was not a part of the revolution she made to find a better life for herself and her children. The fact that her daughter's nickname is Nikki, after her own beloved feminist icon, signifies the ability to revolt without the help of men, and its importance above simple and often misguided love.
"My maternal great-grandfather Mas Fred, as he was known, would plant a coconut tree at his home in Mount Horeb, a neighboring area, for each of his kids and grandkids when they were born. My mother always bragged that hers was the tallest and strongest of the bunch." (page 8)
Wes's mother could have chosen many attributes of her namesake coconut tree to be proud of, but she chooses "tall" and "strong." These adjectives are telling markers of her own personal values of feminine strength. As discussed in the next paragraph, she has grown up in a society where being treated well by men necessitates earning their respect. Wes's mother values physical prowess, demonstrated through strength and height, above all because they prove that she is not helpless, despite what her gender may label her as. Feminine strength is incredibly important to her because it is all that she has, and as a survivor of domestic violence she feels that she must spend the rest of her life proving to herself that she is good enough and strong enough to protect herself from man.
"Bill was too strong, too determined, too high." (page 10)
This quote warps the usually-positive theme of feminine strength into something slightly less appealing. Wes's mother faces a problem that, as Wes points out, many other women often face: the reliance on strength and personal merit to combat problems of sexism and marital violence. She believes that being "strong" will save her from abuse, when in fact it is part of her downfall; Bill doesn't care how strong she is, and in fact it will probably only make him hit harder. Picking up a knife helps her against Bill's attacks, but relying on "strength" for "protection" means that she will always have to be on the defensive, unable to strike back until someone else strikes first. In this scene, Wes draws on a very important aspect of the theme of feminine strength: women often believe that they have to be stronger or better to protect themselves from males, when in reality it is the entire system of male-perpetrated domestic violence against women that must change.
"Soon I could tell by the sound of the steps it was my father. His walk was slower, heavier, more deliberate. My mother tended to move up the stairs in a sprint." (page 11)
The ways in which the two characters move-- the strongest male and the strongest female in young Wes's life-- is symbolic of their places in society. Wes's father moves slowly and deliberately because he knows that he can. As a male in a patriarchal society, the world waits for him rather than the other way around. He is thoughtful and slow because he can afford to be thoughtful and slow without being labeled as useless-- even the slowest man can fix a lightbulb, or paint a house, or engage in any combination of the manual labor that betrays its sexist tendencies in the very word manual. Wes's mother, in contrast, knows that no matter how fast she runs she will always be left behind. As a woman she must constantly prove herself-- unlike her husband, she is guilty of uselessness until proven innocent. She runs up the stairs because she feels the need to prove her strength to herself and to those around her, and (perhaps unconsciously) to ensure her own safety.
"'Wes, he needs to learn what is acceptable and what is not!' My father agreed, but with a gentle laugh, reminded her that cursing at a young boy wasn't the most effective way of making a point. I was saved, for the moment." (page 6)
The first time the reader encounters Wes's mother, it is in a chapter dedicated to the men in his lives: the time "Is Daddy Coming With Us?" signifies his narrative focus on the role of his father in his early life. Mrs. Moore is portrayed as the antithesis to the voice of reason, a fiery woman who must be calmed down by his more gentle father. The idea of a woman who can speak for herself in literature is refreshing, but the ease with which her husband quiets her-- Calm down, honey, you're overreacting-- is not. The theme of feminine strength is diluted here by Wes's father, however well-intentioned. But there is no mistaking the strength in Wes's mother's voice; it is clear that she knows exactly how she wants to raise her child and she will not stand for any other way.
"My mother was obsessed with the poet Nikki Giovanni, in love with her unabashed feminine strength and her reconciliation of love and revolution." (page 7)
Here the theme of the strength of women, which recurs throughout the chapter, is introduced for the first time. Wes's mother likes Nikki Giovanni not for the beauty of her poetry, but for what she symbolizes for women. Ms. Moore's past is one of conflict between love and revolution: though she believed she loved Bill, ultimately he was not a part of the revolution she made to find a better life for herself and her children. The fact that her daughter's nickname is Nikki, after her own beloved feminist icon, signifies the ability to revolt without the help of men, and its importance above simple and often misguided love.
"My maternal great-grandfather Mas Fred, as he was known, would plant a coconut tree at his home in Mount Horeb, a neighboring area, for each of his kids and grandkids when they were born. My mother always bragged that hers was the tallest and strongest of the bunch." (page 8)
Wes's mother could have chosen many attributes of her namesake coconut tree to be proud of, but she chooses "tall" and "strong." These adjectives are telling markers of her own personal values of feminine strength. As discussed in the next paragraph, she has grown up in a society where being treated well by men necessitates earning their respect. Wes's mother values physical prowess, demonstrated through strength and height, above all because they prove that she is not helpless, despite what her gender may label her as. Feminine strength is incredibly important to her because it is all that she has, and as a survivor of domestic violence she feels that she must spend the rest of her life proving to herself that she is good enough and strong enough to protect herself from man.
"Bill was too strong, too determined, too high." (page 10)
This quote warps the usually-positive theme of feminine strength into something slightly less appealing. Wes's mother faces a problem that, as Wes points out, many other women often face: the reliance on strength and personal merit to combat problems of sexism and marital violence. She believes that being "strong" will save her from abuse, when in fact it is part of her downfall; Bill doesn't care how strong she is, and in fact it will probably only make him hit harder. Picking up a knife helps her against Bill's attacks, but relying on "strength" for "protection" means that she will always have to be on the defensive, unable to strike back until someone else strikes first. In this scene, Wes draws on a very important aspect of the theme of feminine strength: women often believe that they have to be stronger or better to protect themselves from males, when in reality it is the entire system of male-perpetrated domestic violence against women that must change.
"Soon I could tell by the sound of the steps it was my father. His walk was slower, heavier, more deliberate. My mother tended to move up the stairs in a sprint." (page 11)
The ways in which the two characters move-- the strongest male and the strongest female in young Wes's life-- is symbolic of their places in society. Wes's father moves slowly and deliberately because he knows that he can. As a male in a patriarchal society, the world waits for him rather than the other way around. He is thoughtful and slow because he can afford to be thoughtful and slow without being labeled as useless-- even the slowest man can fix a lightbulb, or paint a house, or engage in any combination of the manual labor that betrays its sexist tendencies in the very word manual. Wes's mother, in contrast, knows that no matter how fast she runs she will always be left behind. As a woman she must constantly prove herself-- unlike her husband, she is guilty of uselessness until proven innocent. She runs up the stairs because she feels the need to prove her strength to herself and to those around her, and (perhaps unconsciously) to ensure her own safety.
"'Wes, he needs to learn what is acceptable and what is not!' My father agreed, but with a gentle laugh, reminded her that cursing at a young boy wasn't the most effective way of making a point. I was saved, for the moment." (page 6)
The first time the reader encounters Wes's mother, it is in a chapter dedicated to the men in his lives: the time "Is Daddy Coming With Us?" signifies his narrative focus on the role of his father in his early life. Mrs. Moore is portrayed as the antithesis to the voice of reason, a fiery woman who must be calmed down by his more gentle father. The idea of a woman who can speak for herself in literature is refreshing, but the ease with which her husband quiets her-- Calm down, honey, you're overreacting-- is not. The theme of feminine strength is diluted here by Wes's father, however well-intentioned. But there is no mistaking the strength in Wes's mother's voice; it is clear that she knows exactly how she wants to raise her child and she will not stand for any other way.
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